Formal & Legal Intention: It's ALL Yoga Expressing In The United States Of America.

      After the last last last last last, same-ol'-shite verbal & physically in my face, railing on Amy Jin abuse session from Sarah(-adoptive mother), then Sam(-adoptive father), this morning, I finally came to an intention that finally came as complete, from within, to formally and legally end all ties with the people responsible for bringing me to this country which, somehow, like all the things I've been victimized in, they are trying to figure out how to make "my fault." I made a rare call to my adoptive sister. She probably needs to consult them and others before knowing how to see or feel about it, but, in the voice of the little sister I remember, all she knew how to say was, "Bye, Amy."
      It started because Sarah was putting out Easter decorations & mentioned she never liked a bunny my Grandmother Schmelzer had painted for me when I was a child. I said I loved it & suggested a couple places it should go. She said it wasn't going out anywhere in her house now, all of a sudden, &, in fact, she noticed (during the many invasions she/they've made into the places where I reside/have my things in the house) that when I cleaned "the room" (that used to be "my" room, which is no longer--They're now all "hers") last week, I moved some of the picture frames, which she threatened to throw me out on the streets for. Her/their favorite thing to say is she's/they're happy to put me back "under a bridge" & say they have all of these supposed "people" or "friends" who regularly put me down (Bigots/ignoramus' from Dubuque, of course)(primarily cuz they got the Lion, not the Mouse), call me "weird," "crazy," or whatever else they're saying (See previous writing about the people who ate Jesus' "crazy bread")--then rant questions that aren't really questions (because I've given them the answers multiple times) about what's "WRONG with you?!!!!" Hmm. Maybe I'm in a foreign country, as an orphan, who's been now totally murdered by the family who received a gift and trashed it.
      Seems like Sam & Sarah Schmelzer, and any remaining connections who've supported their insanity/spiritually (if not in fact) criminal activity, in my regard (Technically, when you do things directly causative to taking away a person's ability to live or hold down work of any kind, that's known as killing someone off--& on purpose? And when you then turn around & tell people it's because the person did something wrong, when they didn't, and when they came back to you BECAUSE they were victimized, and you offer them safe haven, but use it to empower your own life and energy & beat them over the head for accepting the offer, that's called BULLS**T. And when you can't own up when your own child stares you in the eyes, after he or she's again proven you wrong, & U respond with more lies and insults, that's called CRIMINAL according to anyone who's NOT nuts/decent & not split about it).
      For the nth time, I was told she hopes I never have children of my own because there are "slow" people who've "made something of their lives" (working at Wal-Mart or what have U), & I've made nothing of mine. As she's making faces at me &, as usual, using my own words to try to come after me (This proves my efficacy as a Teacher, at least, since though they've learned nothing, at least they're copying me!), telling me I'm "abusing them" in their home, since, after hearing/seeing all of it with my mouth open & my coffee cup almost dropping out of my hand, I shout (finally) that they're horrible, sick people--that they are, in fact, s**t. And in deep s**t. And I hope they're punished, brought out be4 the public--but, I mean, by who? Along with anyone else to whom this applies (Step out from behind the pillars & out of the shadows, Dark Ones!!!!!!! Come battle with the Light, and let's see who Wins!!!). I think the logic I've seen from my upbringing, however, says that that understanding of God says God doesn't care so long as U show up to church & make nice with everyone else, even if U walk away totally trashing them.

Due Karma.

4 Special "Awake" Others: A Shout-Out

      It's rare that I leave "testimonials" (which I've never dug) on this indefinite Internet presence for my teaching/leadership/Love Yoga: The Movement for more than a few weeks--maybe a month or so, however, 4 special "New Kids"/supporting incarnate Angels stepped forward to speak their Truth about the proof in the pudding, which is what they experienced in knowing me and walked away with from Personalized work/asana practice.
      It's not easy to step forward, be in front of the public--much less the entire world, which our technology has quickly and potently enabled--speak your truth, and let the chips fall where they may, however, it is the ONLY thing we're all here to do and operate from. The Truth. There is no path (of any kind) of value in our society that would say otherwise.
      Therefore, thanks to these beautiful souls as I step away and stand alone again--and not just in this world--for bringing their Light, their passion for Justice and Power Yoga, their willingness to lead, not follow in this sad, sad world, and their all-encompassing Beauty, soul-deep, to the fore on behalf of what often feels like a far too lone journey for any one leader or teacher to lead or teach herself:

*Michael Bogolia, Jr. - 'Sup Monterey Bay/Seaside, Cali!!!--Home to the most superior Ashtanga Yoga shala on United States of American soil, while under the care & rulership of Emily (Surname unknown).--For being the "lil' Eminem" compelling, wise, Christ-like, and in tune enough to allow the Ashtanga to take permanent residence in my being. For sharing your Shasta Lake experience, even though U've said U can't remember telling me about it now (Ask Pratap!).

*Z.W. (Zakh Ward), Wartburg College grad, loud and proud (/or my "It was what it was")!, presently IBM (Dubuque)--For your intelligence, protection, love, and your participation. For a natural, strong practice that truly allowed the tradition to be of very real value to the "insane working" world. For the OM necklace and endless nights pow-wow'ing in an atmosphere that was real to music that helped us both connect to our pasts, presents, and futures. For allowing me to break down my usual barriers and be loved, not as a spiritual leader or teacher or sage, but as a human being. For being able to see things as they truly are, not how people desire them to be, while still being able to hold the vision for how things should be, based on what we all desire. The heart of 2013 belonged to U, in return. Pz.

*Heather Kemp, Food & Beverage Supervisor and Bartender at The Diamond Jo Casino (Dubuque, IA!) & The Cave (East Dubuque, IL), respectively--I am so proud of U. For your natural teacher energy and beautiful practice shared as you became more regular in class. I hope it helped your life and journey here, including the myriad people you inevitably care for. Continue that beautiful balance of incredible strength and sweet softness, simultaneously, and most importantly, fearless kindness, no matter how many times they hurt U.

*My "GAIAM Girl," Kelli Edwards, Peosta Community Center Power Yogini--You are beautiful, inside and out, and took so naturally to the Flow. Thanks for showing up with dedication and growing in the practice, being a quiet but constant and powerful force of love and support, which just goes to prove it wasn't just the yoga that gave you that special glow. It seems that for some of us, the yoga is just something that can finally love us back as big and flawlessly as we give it out. I hope you felt that and continue to practice the beauty of traditional yoga, regardless of circumstance, wherever you are.

A Bow Of Servant Leadership & Love To Each Of You.